feeling physically tired and mentally drained. =x haven't been studying really hard the past week, even though i should since i have less lessons the last week. but shouldn't i rest more now when i can afford the time, and reserve the energy i have for chionging for exams during the study break that is just coming up in 2 weeks time. i'm just confused over what i should do. i know i should relax or i'll just lose my stamina to study [which i'm so afraid that day might arrive :( ] but i'll feel guilty whenever i don't make use of my time to do something constructive (which i would define as studying). but again, there's just too much to study. no point telling myself that i'll relax once i'm done with the studying, cause that day won't come. received a bad news yesterday that we would be tested on the stuff we learnt in sem 1 for dental practice exam. that's so scary and crazy. have to really start revising already =x
suddenly feeling very emo-ish, after talking to my family for close to an hour. i feel really bad for always making my parents worry for me, knowing that i'm worried about some things. yes, my apartment. finding accomodation really sucks. i'm really comfortable staying at cs cause its just so convenient and my apartment is very spacious. but i don't want to pay so much esp since we don't need so much space. i would rather save on the rent and spend more on food. we (tricia and i) inspected smaller 2 bedrooms in cs, and we r kind of comfortable with the space though we wouldn't save a lot by moving to a smaller unit, but i guess it's (~$90 a month) still something. AND paying empty rent sucks totally. moving sucks too. sighh.
my dad, mum and sis were telling me not to worry cause they won't mind paying that 2 months of empty rent when i'm back in singapore. i feel very bad though. its like throwing a few thousands away. :(
and they were saying that we shouldn't move cause its too much of a hassle =x how!? i really don't know what to do. :(
my mum's always worried that i'll be worried :( even over small things. like just now i asked her if the uncooked rice can be kept over the few months when we r back in sg, and she said don't have to worry about it. ahhh i don't want my parents to worry about me :( but i guess it cannot be helped. just like how i cannot help feeling homesick. i just have the very sad feeling whenever my mum ask if i've been taking care of myself, like if i've been drinking the ginseng and essence of chicken etc. and my sis told my mum that i was craving for my fav marks and spencers' triple chocolate crunch and she wanted to buy to bring over when she comes in two weeks time, but worried that customs won't allow. and she was like "how?..(in the worrying tone)" Seriously, i wouldn't die without eating my trip choco crunch. i just don't want my mum to keep thinking too much for me. i feel horrible.
=(
