upset...

with myself for being grumpy, selfish, full of myself, not being understanding towards others, and many other things.

so, what happened to one of my 2012 resolutions of wanting to be nicer to those around me? :( a bad start.

i must try (much) harder.


some things just affect me so much that i feel really bad/upset. how i wish i can be of help to those around me :(

sad things aside, i met up with my laogong today and the meet-up really made me happy (meeting her always make me happy).

been going out very often and spending a lot of money. i always have this sudden urge to graduate and earn money so that i won't have to spend my parents' money. 2 more years. CAN'T WAIT!

Lord, i pray for a better 2012 for my loved ones.

=(

the past 3 weeks had been rather a breeze and i really like that kind of life. but it just had to end on a bad note.

YOU made me feel so horrible, as if i really wanted it to happen. BUT NO, i tried very hard and it just didn't work out. you were simply so sarcastic (every sentence you said was trying to imply something negative). it won't hurt you to be just a little encouraging, right? give me a chance to move on, and I'll promise that I'll be better.

i simply don't know if you are trying to play some reverse psychology game with me. like you think the harsher you treat me, the more i'll prove you wrong? if that's the case, i really really hope that i'll be able to prove you wrong.

but for now, because of you, i'll losing faith (or rather lost faith) in myself and feel so useless.

=(

=(

this fri (today) is so different from last friday. i'm feeling really upset over some stuff (with myself especially). anyway just glad that its over. but then its not totally over since its a weekly thing. am i going to be depressed over this thing next week and next next week and so on?! seriously i hope not. i know there's nothing i should be confused about or nobody that i should be responsible to for this thing, but then its just so difficult to do it the way i want. there's other pple involved and i cannot just simply ignore. wanted to tell deb about it but she sounded happy when i called her just now so didn't want to spoil her mood with my problems. talked to yuting about it online...it was really a good timing that she came online just when i wanted to talk to her.

i'm such a confused person. :(

humph

i'm feeling angry with someone. its always that same person who's making me angry and upset. sighh. why!

and i feel like complaining about that person to u (cause that's what i've been doing) , but then again, i know u will tell me the same thing which i choose not to listen, or rather, i should say, i have my own difficulties.

i feel really bad to trouble people :(

upset.